My Christmas Cock-Up: A Reverse Harem Naughty Nights Romance
My Christmas Cock-Up: A Reverse Harem Naughty Nights Romance
SPICE LEVEL WARNING: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
So there I was, thinking I’d hit the Christmas jackpot: a solo, sassy retreat in a picturesque mountain cabin. You know, a festive reboot to un-break my heart?
But life, with its hilarious sense of humor, handed me not one, not two, but three unexpected roomies.
Synopsis
Synopsis
So there I was, thinking I’d hit the Christmas jackpot: a solo, sassy retreat in a picturesque mountain cabin. You know, a festive reboot to un-break my heart? But life, with its hilarious sense of humor, handed me not one, not two, but three unexpected roomies.
Picture this: three hotter-than-a-yule-log dudes claiming they've rented the same cabin. The universe is clearly trying to make me its punchline. I mean, Christmas miracles? Sure. But three at once? Someone up there’s been sipping too much eggnog.
Mr. Towering-and-Tempting is a hot chocolate aficionado, with emphasis on HOT. Then there's Mr. Six-Pack-Deck-The-Halls, who brings a whole new meaning to “jingle all the way.” And the third? Let's just say he's got a certain...gift for gifting. And trust me, it's not the kind you unwrap under the tree.
Look, Santa, if you're eavesdropping, I’ve been a kinda good girl this year. But with these three making my mistletoe dreams come true, all bets are off. Because on this Christmas eve, there's a very good chance I’ll be finding more than just sugarplums dancing in my head.
Chapter 1 Look Inside
Chapter 1 Look Inside
“Solstice Greetings!”
Without looking up, I knew Iris, our resident hippy born in the wrong decade, had just barged into my office.
It was all so San Francisco, the land where oddballs and tech nerds lived side-by-side in cozy harmony.
Like Iris working at a financial services firm, which was totally against her vibe.
But I wasn’t complaining. Not at all. She made the place interesting with her celebration of weird pagan holidays and break room ‘treats,’ occasionally laced with the now-legal cannabis, the scent of which permeated every nook and cranny of the town.
“Hey, Iris, um, greetings… and stuff,” I said. “Ready for the holidays?”
Yeah, she was in the spirit. Her Christmas sweater bordered on the offensive—the tree on it looked more like a big green penis than anything.
She nodded enthusiastically. “Of course. You?”
“Just wrapping up some last-minute stuff and then it’s time off until after New Year’s,” I said. “Not sure what I’m doing yet.”
But I was hoping against hope something would materialize, and in particular, with the hot guy I’d been seeing. I was playing it cool, though.
That’s how I rolled.
“You could always celebrate the season the way I do,” Iris said with a grin. “Elk and I are going to honor the goddess properly.”
I wasn’t sure which goddess she was referring to, or how she would be honored properly, and I wasn’t going to ask. After all, it took me months to realize ‘Elk’ was Iris’s partner, although I was never sure whether Elk was male, female or something else altogether. I’d come a long way from small town Idaho, where I’d grown up. And escaped from, first chance I got.
Shit was different here in San Francisco, like different-universe different. I didn’t need people thinking I was a total hick. I had plans.
“Sounds lovely,” I said, hoping she wouldn’t elaborate.
I glanced back at my computer screen in a passive-aggressive way to drop the hint that I had shit to do.
She gave me a peace sign. “Remember Tali, a woman should always enjoy the freedom that comes from fully embracing the goddess. Don’t let the patriarchy’s lessons oppress you.”
I nodded earnestly. “I won’t, Iris. Promise.”
There was a rustle behind her as my boss squeezed into my miniscule office, which was barely big enough for me, never mind three people.
“Excuse me, ladies,” Shawn said, sucking in his belly.
He looked at Iris, who was cringing at being called a ‘lady.’ “Can I have a moment with Tali?” he asked.
“Sure,” she said. “Happy Solstice, Shawn.”
“Happy Solstice, Iris,” Shawn mumbled, watching her leave. “My grandma back in Virginia would say that girl wasn’t right. Solstice. And that sweater…”
“Interesting, huh?” I said, hoping to avoid discussing Iris’s penis sweater with my boss. “How’s your day going, Shawn?”
“Good, good…” He stretched out his arm to get a look at his wrist watch, something he always did before he started speaking.
“Just wanted to see how you’re looking on finishing your report before you go on vacation. And… I’m dropping something off.” Grinning, he took an envelope out of his suit pocket and handed it to me. “Congratulations on a great year. I wanted to thank you personally.”
Holy crap. Was this what I hoped it was? I could so use some extra cash.
I was going to think positively, and pray it wasn’t just a Starbucks gift card or something like that. I’d received so many of those from cheap bosses over the years that I could open my own store.
“Well thank you, Shawn, that’s very generous. So, I’ve got a bit more work to do, but I’ll have it tied up within the hour. Are you seeing family for Christmas?”
“Of course. Like always. In-laws. You?”
“Not sure yet, but definitely something fun.”
I wasn’t letting him know I had nothing going on, fun or otherwise.
“Speaking of fun, when you get back in January, we need to talk. There will be a couple director slots opening up…” he said in a sing-song voice, undoubtedly designed to tantalize me.
It worked.
I tried to keep from looking too excited, but the truth was, I wanted to jump up and down. One of those positions would be mine. No fucking way I was getting passed over again.
But I didn’t want to seem too eager.
I took a long draw on my Diet Coke and nodded slowly. “Really, Shawn. That sounds very interesting.” I said, trying not to choke.
“You’ve earned it, Tali. And what you’ll find in that envelope reflects that.”
In spite of my best efforts, I tore the thing open like a kid on Christmas morning, my jaw dropping at its contents.
Holy crap. It was a thank you letter confirming a Christmas bonus worth more than my father made in two months.
“Merry Christmas, Tali,” Shawn said with a wink, and left.
As soon as he was gone, I whipped out my phone to check my online bank account. And there it was—my Christmas bonus signed, sealed, and delivered, safely ensconced in my checking account for all sorts of spending pleasure.
And spending it was going to be a pleasure.
With dollar signs rolling around in my head, an idea hit. With this kind of cash, I could celebrate the holidays in style.
Suddenly my lack of plans didn’t hurt as much.
I went straight to Airbnb, where I found a cabin three hours away in Lake Tahoe at the fancy Squaw Valley ski resort. I’d only ever been there for the day once, in the middle of summer, and had been aching to go back during snow season.
But because the holiday was just days away, the pickings were slim. The ‘cabin’ I found—pretty much the only one left—was a huge three-bedroom sprawl. But it was ski-in/ski-out—I could put my skis on and hit the slopes right from my front door. No need to drive anywhere, fight traffic, or look for parking.
That, in itself, would be worth the price of admission.
I booked the place. “I earned this,” I reminded myself, entering my credit card info.
I was on my way to Lake Tahoe.
This was not only a nice little gift to myself, but also hopefully the guy I’d been dating, Aaron. He’d not really mentioned anything about holiday plans, I assumed because he didn’t want to come off as pushing things too fast.
So, following his lead, I didn’t bring them up, either.
But this could be a perfect, low-pressure thing to do from Christmas to New Year’s. I was ready to take things to the next level with him, and the signs all indicated he was into me, too.
I jammed to finish the last of my work. Time to get to the mall. Sexy new panties were the next thing I’d be spending my bonus money on.
* * *
“Miss?”
I looked up, shaking pleasant holiday planning memories from my head as I realized I was standing in front of a gas station cashier. “Sorry?” I mumbled.
He glanced at the people in line behind me. “Your gasoline, along with the chili dog and lemonade, is fifty-three dollars.”
I fumbled for my debit card, knocking over a whole Slim Jim display.
“Miss,” he said, “are you okay?”
“Um… not really,” I said, looking at the people in line behind me.
Fuck them.
The clerk, who looked all of sixteen and definitely would not be able to relate to the shit storm that had become my life in the last twenty-four hours, smiled brightly. “It’s almost Christmas, so it can’t be all bad, can it?”
I laid the pile of Slim Jims on the counter and stuffed my debit card back in my pocket.
“It sucks, if you must know,” I sniffed, and brushed past the surprised onlookers, probably in a hurry to get home to their decorated trees, roaring fires, and happy families.
Me, not so much.
My apartment was warm when I got back home from the mall, new panties in tow. Which was strange. Considering I grew up in Idaho, I almost never turned the heat on in my apartment. San Francisco didn’t really get that cold.
Did I forget? Or maybe…
“Hello?” I whispered, turning on the living room light.
But I smiled when I saw the black work boots next to my front door.
Aaron.
We’d exchanged keys only the week before, another important step in the progress of our relationship. He must have been there early to surprise me or something, but the surprise was going to be on him. I was home a full hour earlier than I’d planned because the last of my work had gone super-fast, and I’d cleaned out the sale bin at Victoria’s Secret in under fifteen minutes.
I undid a few buttons on my blouse and slipped my heels off as I tip-toed through my apartment. I was going to surprise my guy with a nice, sweet blowie—my roommate was out and we’d be able to make all the noise we wanted.
I crept down the hallway and realized funny sounds were coming from my bedroom. I blushed a little, but I’d heard those sounds before. Aaron and I had a thing about watching porn together. It got us so turned on he’d fuck me senseless before we were even ten minutes into a show.
I loved that he’d started without me.
“Hey, babe, you don’t need—” I called as I opened my bedroom door, the words dying on my lips.
Holy shit.
There was Aaron.
Naked, yes.
With a hard-on, yes.
But with my roommate.
My fucking roommate.
Going at it.
“Yeah, Daddy,” she moaned. “Harder! Fuck my ass!”
“God you’re tight,” Aaron groaned, smacking her jiggling butt cheeks. “Tali would never get this wild.”
They still hadn’t noticed me.
“That’s why you got me as your side chick,” she said. “Mmmm, you’re a dirty fuck boy. You going to wash up before fucking her tonight?”
“Maybe,” Aaron said. “If she ever comes home. Her job’s more important than my dick.”
“It’s a fucking big dick too,” she moaned. “Fuck, baby, you’re going to make me come again. Harder!”
I dropped my purse, the contents clattering to the floor. The peppermint mocha latte I’d enjoyed at the mall was suddenly churning in my stomach, and I could swear the room was moving around me.
Aaron glanced my way, not even losing pace on his thrusts. “Hey, Tal… we got the Christmas party started without you.”
“You… what…” I stammered. “Are you fucking my roommate?” I asked like an idiot.
She looked my way and smiled. “Climb on up and join us,” she said, extending her hand.
“What? Fuck you! Fuck you both!
Having paid for my gas and snacks, I yanked the car door shut and cranked the heat to drive away the almost-zero wind chill. I took a big bite out of my chili dog, which promptly spurted red grease down the front of my new ski jacket.
Another thing I’d bought with my Christmas bonus.
I watched the stain sink into the fabric of my puffer, which fit perfectly with the way the rest of my life was going.
* * *